It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time - The Second Series
by MarvelAndDCWriter
Summary: Chapter 8 - Tony re-calls what happened at Comic-Con.
1. Chapter 1 - The Valentine's Day Disaster

A.N. First off, no, unlike my last ISLAGIATT story, this isn't an alternate series. This series is still supposed take place in Livin4Jesus's series, just written by me (for example, this story takes place after Chapter 25 of her story.). She has been gracious enough to allow to take her idea, and write my own stories with it. I hope you enjoy mine as much as hers! :)

**The Valentine's Day Disaster**

"I got it!" Tony exclaimed, clapping his hands together, while turning (in his awesome swivel chair) to face Clint. "We're going to make it up to them today, on Valentine's Day." He grinned in self-satisfaction. "It will be perfect."

Clint gave him a wary look. "Are you sure about that? The last time we tried to do something nice, a video of us in drag got uploaded to YouTube."

"To be fair, that experiment was more for me then them. And hey, at least be glad that video got removed due to violating YouTube's Community Guidelines." Tony pointed out. "And it wasn't that bad.

Clint gave him a look. 'Are you serious?' "_Really_?"

"Yes," Tony protested. "Only 3…million people saw it."

"At least you were wearing clothes in that video, sir," said the snarky voice of J.A.R.V.I.S. "It was such a relief."

"Shut up J.A.R.V.I.S." he snapped while Clint chuckled.

"You be quiet too Happy Feet, or I'll turn you back into a bird," Tony threatened, pointing at Clint.

"Did you just call me a penguin?" Clint asked confused. "Why?" he asked off of Tony's nod.

"Because a penguin is a flightless bird, just like you."

Clint thought about it for a moment. "That barely works, Tin Man."

Tony nodded. "But it does work, so shut up and help me with this idea."

Clint walked over to Tony. "All right then what'd need help with?"

"I've had this idea planned for a long time now; Valentine's Day seemed like the best opportunity to present it." Tony grinned, unveiling the blueprints. "So, think it will blow their socks off, or will it blow their socks off?"

**)()(**

"So, do you have any idea why they called us in the main floor?" Natalie asked Pepper, who had just arrived as well.

She shrugged. "Who knows when it comes to those two?"

Suddenly, the entire room turned pitch black before strobe lights ripped through it with an array of bright colors.

You rolled up holding a tray with two goggle-type items on it.

They gave each other a glance before putting them on. 'What the hell? It couldn't hurt.'

Suddenly, a panel in the ceiling opened up as a giant 30 x 10 card was lowered in-front of them. The front of the card was outfitted with a 3-D holographic projection of Clint and Tony, wearing their respective outfits, in an awesome pose.

Then in bold, white letters, a huge message appeared over their image:

**To Natalie and Pepper: Have a High-Flying, Straight-Shooting Day!**

In 3-D, everything about it was spectacular, well worth the money he spent. The fog machine and strobe lights added a nice touch of excitement that Tony craved. It even seemed like Natalie and Pepper were enjoying it (he hoped).

The presentation ended with both Tony and Clint walking out as a fog machine was blowing smoke behind them, making for a very dramatic entrance.

Pepper was nodding slowly. "Very impressive."

"Even I have to agree….that was 'cool,'" Natalie reluctantly admitted.

Stark grinned. "Just wait 'till you see what's inside." Taking out a remote, he pressed the big red button on it and waited. Nothing happened.

Stark frowned. He pressed the button again, and again, and then again. Still nothing except for a few whirring sounds.

He chuckled, slightly embarrassed. Raising his arm as high as he could, he brought down his fist, slamming it as hard as he could on the control's button.

Suddenly, the card did in-fact open. It also released a huge wave of smoke when it did, enough to cover everything in the room, including Natalie and Pepper (who took the full force of the smoke firsthand.).

Tony's jaw-dropped, while Clint just stood there in utter awe and shock. The lights slowly came back on.

"That so wasn't supposed to happen," Tony said after awhile. He could only surmise that the gears/wiring that was supposed to operate the card had malfunctioned and backfired, causing it to explode and release the – hopefully, not deadly – smoke that was now all throughout the floor, covering everything.

Natalie and Pepper both removed their glasses, glaring daggers at Tony and Clint.

Tony resisted the urge to point out that due to the glasses covering their eyes, it looked kind of comical that there was no soot there, while Clint resisted the urge to chuckle.

"Okay, in my defense….it did in fact seem like a good idea at the time. Plus, I was trying to make it up to you guys! C'mon!" Tony protested as they both surrounded him and Clint.

**Happy Valentine's Day everybody! I hope you enjoyed the story!**


	2. Chapter 2 - Glorious Revenge

A.N. So, people like my series too. Glad to hear it. :) Hopefully, maybe my series will be as well-reviewed as hers (but I know that's probably not going to happen). :P Anyway, this story takes place before Chapter 26 of her story, and involves a certain being with a glorious purpose. ;) Once again, thanks to L4J for letting me do this. Enjoy!

**Glorious Revenge**

Loki Laufeyson sat in his secret hideout, a rocky cave in what would be considered the slums of Asgard. His sorcery prevented him from being detected by anyone, not unless he wanted to be found.

He was deep in thought; thinking about how his last encounter with The Avengers had gone. After revealing that he, the God of Mischief, was behind the prank, had made a hasty retreat once that overgrown rodent made an appearance.

He chuckled remembering how easy it was to shave the beast (magic helped out with this particular task). Though he couldn't help but feel his abrupt exit made for some mocking comments.

'_Not a problem.' _All he had to do was look upon the reflecting pond, and slowly, but surely, the images from that day appeared.

_Loki's eyes widened and he ran out of the room screaming. "It seemed like a good idea at the time!"_

_Tony eyed the door where Loki has run out of then rolled his eyes. "What a wimp, I can't believe he almost beat us last time."_

_"Well, he did have an alien army to help him," Clint pointed out._

He growled, before splashing the water, rippling the images. How dare they insult him, the maggots?! Now something had to be done…there had to be retribution for their insolence.

It occurred to him that several days had passed since his last encounter with them; perhaps he should view what transpired since that time.

Loki summoned the Globe of Worlds over to him, and then focused his energy on Stark Tower. Almost as if he was watching the video footage itself, he was viewing the Valentine's Day disaster. He saw as the card exploded, sending the smoke everywhere and covering everything.

He smirked. There would indeed be hell to pay for that 'act of kindness' (to quote Stark), but there had to be something more he could do, something that would really punish them. Barton had asked if his purpose was to make their lives miserable, and that seemed like a good idea at the time, but now it was something Loki held dear to his heart.

He thought for a moment. _'What could be worse than messing up a Valentine's Day gift?' _An idea suddenly came to him._ 'What about missing the day completely?'_ Mortals, especially women, seemed to take that holiday very seriously, with them buying chocolate, and flowers, and cards for each other. It personally made him sick, but then again, he was _a God_, not a worm.

Returning the globe to its spot, he thought long and hard how he could make it so that those two nimrods forgot that precious day. He thought of an idea, but it would take almost all the dark energy he could muster.

Loki held out his left arm, concentrating all his might on Earth. Then, he forcefully closed his left hand. The big blue planet stopped spinning, almost as if an invisible hand grabbed it and wouldn't let go. All life on the planet ceased as well; people were frozen in time all over the world.

He held up his right arm, pointed his index finger outward, and then slowly began turning it counter-clockwise. The Earth began to follow suit, and the people did too; they would be walking backwards, spilled items would fly back from wherever they fell from, and so on. Certain events would actually be quite comical, but if he dared stopped concentrating, even for a second, the spell would weaken and would dissolve, as if the act was never attempted in the first place.

He stopped when the day was 2-13, 11:59 P.M. He grinned, sitting back down on his rocky throne, a little diminished – it's not everyday someone turns back to World - but totally satisfied with his work. He had effectively turned back time to the night before Valentine's Day.

It took merely a thought to erase the day from both of their minds, both of which were sleeping peacefully, unaware of what just transpired. He also destroyed the blueprint of the card Stark was working on, just to make sure all loose ends were completely cut. Tony Stark and Clint Barton has no idea that tomorrow was Valentine's Day, and would awake to face something worse than any threat they had ever faced before: their pissed off girlfriends.

All he had to do was sit back and watch the chaos unfold. He couldn't wait to see how they would try and get out of this situation. It would be glorious.


	3. Chapter 3 - 50 Shades of Green

**A.N. **I just realized that some of you might be wondering why I'm writing a second ISLAGIATT series, and might be wondering who I am? Well, I was the co-writer for some of her chapters (still am too) and I wrote Ch. 18 all by myself. It was actually her who suggested that I should/could write my own stories and post them on _my _account. So I did just that. ;) Just think of mine as lead-ins and follow-ups to her chapters. I'm glad to see that people are enjoying them as well. :) Also, just to let you know, every chapter I write has the L4J stamp of approval (so you know they're bound to be good). Sorry that was so long, I just wanted to address everything at once. This takes place immediately after Chapter 30. And, I was able to fulfill some requests as well!

mtmte: After the St. Patty's day party Tony and Clint wake up to find green dye all over their hands. They ended up not only dying their heads green but all of the other Avengers as well!

Marie Nomad: Can we have some Rhodey involved shenanigans?

I hope you enjoy!

**50 Shades of Green**

Tony awoke as a high-pitched scream jolted through his earlobe. He bolted up, ready to come to the rescue (if that was the case), then groaned as he got a massive head rush, causing him to sit back down. After S.H.I.E.L.D.'s 'pathetic attempt at a party but could barely pass for a meet-and-greet' on the Helicarrier, the team had returned to Avenger Tower for the real party to begin…which consisted of only Tony, Clint, JA.R.V.I.S., and You, who was serving drinks. The others declined, satisfied with watching movies the rest of the night.

Tony shrugged it off. _'Their loss_,_'_ Tony thought to himself. He had a wide variety of snacks, drinks, and had a live D.J., who provided thumping music throughout the floor. And speaking of drinks, he had decided to expand his variety, and, since it was St. Patrick's Day after all, had decided to switch over to the dark ale for the night.

Never did he think Guinness could get him drunker than his usual drink, but he had been wrong before, and was again. _'Man, those Irish really know what to drink, that was a really great buzz. But I'm getting sick of these hangovers…I should try and do something about those things.'_

Tony snapped of his daze as he heard the sound the heavy footsteps running. Clint came tearing out of the bathroom, panting, his face a mixture of horror and shock.

Tony burst out laughing as he saw Clint and knew why the archer had screamed: his usual brown hair was a nice frothy mint color. He just couldn't stop laughing and pointing at Clint. Since Clint did it to him so often, then why couldn't the shoe be on the other foot?

Clint's eyes suddenly narrowed. "What's on your hand?" He asked, almost dangerously.

Tony stopped laughing, except for the occasional chuckle, and looked confused. "Huh?"

"What's. On. Your. Hand?" he repeated, taking a step towards Tony, who immediately took a step back.

'_I'm not sure I like where this is going.'_ Tony glanced at his hands slowly, almost as if he was afraid of what he would see. When he finally did glance down, he noticed his hands were the shade of green Clint's hair was, along with splotches of other shades of green. But it was the lighter shade that they were both focused on. He sighed, knowing what would come next.

Clint charged after Tony, who of course, ran like hell. He chased Tony around the floor, taking swipes at him with Tony dodging his 'unjustified assault' as Tony thought it was. Of course, they were both hung-over, so it mostly consisted of Tony stumbling away from Clint, and Clint stumbling after Tony.

J.A.R.V.I.S. would've spoken up to say that the security cameras on that floor were recording everything, but he wanted to see how this was going to play out.

Finally, the strain of being upright took its toll on Clint, who fell down after tripping over his own feet. Tony grinned. Leaping over Clint, barely, just barely making it, he ran towards the elevator. Once he got downstairs, he would be safe.

But Clint surprised him by grabbing Tony's foot and stopping him in mid-leap, causing him to smash into the floor. His "Kiss me, I'm Irish" cap fell on the floor too, but that was the least of his problems. He forcefully pulled his foot free from Clint's grasp, who let go rather easily, actually…too easy. '_Uh-oh.' _That was never a good sign. He quickly crawled away, and then glanced back at Clint.

Clint's face looked it he wasn't sure how to process information he was just receiving, and Tony wondered if he should be concerned, though he wasn't sure if it should be for Clint or himself.

Then, he started rolling around, laughing hysterically and pointed at Tony. _'Oh dear God, no.' _Tony ran to the bathroom to check his hair, and lo-and-behold, his hair was a bold olive color, and he even had honeydew frosted tips.

Clint's laughter echoed down the bathroom as Tony franticly searched the cabinets for the hair dye he used to fix his hair last time, only to discover, once he finally did find it, that it was empty. He sighed; it was going to be a long day.

He left the bathroom, think about how he could rectify this problem. _'At least I can wear my cap until I'm able to get to the store and –_' He paused when he saw Clint hold up his S.H.I.E.L.D. issued, high-tech, spy camera. It could take pictures, record audio, and could videotape as well, and Tony was pretty sure he knew what Clint was using it for right this instance.

He immediately made a beeline towards the elevator as fast as he could. "J.A.R.V.I.S., open the door!" he commanded. The elevator doors opened and the second they did, Tony bolted inside, repeatedly pressing the 'close door' button as Clint approached. The doors closed, with seconds to spare, as the elevator lurched downward.

When it stopped on the main floor, Tony exited the elevator, fully prepared to suit up in the Mark VII and get the hell out of there, only for him to be stopped and gasp at what was in-front of him.

Each and every Avenger, Pepper included, were all gathered in the living room, and each one had a different dye of green for their hair color. Tony had a faint recollection of looking up different shades of green, though at the time, he was just wondering what color Loki's cape was. Then, he thought what would happen if he dyed the teams hair all of the different shades he was researching…it did seem like a good idea at the time.

Pepper and Natasha actually looked quite striking with green hair. In fact, to his dismay, each and every Avenger looked quite good with green hair. Only he and Clint looked weird with their new hairdo.

Suddenly, FBJ flew into the room, squawking. His feathers were a lovely forest green.

Before Tony could say anything, Natasha spoke up. "I don't know how you did this, but you'd better fix it. _Now._"

Tony hung his head in defeat; there was nothing he could say that they haven't heard before. The elevator doors opened, and Clint came running out, video recorder in hand, only to stop when he saw what had occurred.

**)()(**

Tony sat down in his chair, exhausted, as Clint sprawled out on the sofa. They had spent the entire day finding dye that matched their original hair colors, then (on the team's insistence) hand dyed the hair back one by one, when he could've had J.A.R.V.I.S. do it quite easily (Natasha didn't want Tony to touch her with a ten-foot pole, and forced Clint to do it; not that he minded one bit). Clint had also agreed to dye back his own hair; since they were both sure he had helped out in some way, even if they didn't know how yet.

Tony's phone rang. He glanced at the called I.D. only be shocked to see Rhodey's face. "Rhodey? _PleasetellmeIdidn'tdyeyourhairgreen_," he asked all in one breath.

"No, not green." The elevator doors opened to reveal Rhodey dressed exactly like a leprechaun: with the orange hair, a giant orange beard, a white ruffled shirt and green short-short overalls, complete with the green jacket, and gold belt buckle, finished with white thigh-high socks and black dress shoes. He looked so truly and utterly ridiculous that Clint was tempted to take a picture; not to hold it over his head or anything, just to look at and laugh whenever he wanted.

Tony put on his best smile. "It seemed like a good idea at the time?"

**Hope everybody had a good St. Patrick's Day!**


	4. Chapter 4 - It's an Audi?

**A.N.** Thanks to all who have reviewed and followed and favorited! I really do appreciate it! :) I know that this story is short, but it just came to me. It's kind of a follow-up to L4J's Chapter 2. And thanks to L4J for the awesome title! Enjoy.

**"It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's… an Audi?"**

"Let me get this straight," Steve said exasperated. "You, once again, somehow managed to get your car into the living room, with no way of knowing how you got it up here? Again?"

"Um, incorrecto Big Blue," Tony answered. "I know _exactly_ how it happened this time. J.A.R.V.I.S., if you would?"

Video footage came on the screen, showing the room before its imminent destruction. How the screen wasn't destroyed too was anybody's guess.

Clint, Steve, and Tony all stared at the screen, waiting for something to happen. They waited…and waited…and waited…

Steve was about to turn around and leave when all of a sudden *BAM!* The car (in the video) crashed through the glass windows, shattering all of them, spewing glass everywhere and destroying anything and everything in its path. The car however, managed to land upright, without so much of a scratch on it. Steve stared at the screen, stunned beyond belief.

"Two words: Car catapult." Was all Tony said.

"What on Earth made you possibly think that – !"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time," Tony interrupted.

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing, while Clint just chuckled. "How the heck did you even clean up this mess without any of us noticing?"

As if to answer Steve's question, a bunch of miniature robots came out of no less than a dozen hiding places and instantly went to work.

One swept up the glass; others worked on getting rid of any ruble; and a third group brought in new furniture, while the rest brought in new glass for the windows and set them up. In less than 30 seconds, the entire room looked brand new, like nothing had happened in there for months. The robots then returned to their various hiding places.

Both Steve and Clint gave Tony a look. "I may have 'borrowed' a few extra bots from Damage Control," Tony said sheepishly. "But in my defense, I did in fact pay for them." _'If a pile of cash and a note saying 'Here's for the bots. Signed, TS' counts as paying for them.'_ But Tony would keep that part to himself.

Steve slowly nodded his head (he was still getting used to the wonders of future technology and now, apparently, robot maids existed.). "Okay, I get that the room got fixed and all, but how is it that the car didn't get damaged at all?"

Tony shrugged. "What can I say? Audi makes a good car."


	5. Chapter 5 - Triple E

**A.N.** This is the direct sequel to the Easter chapter L4J posted. She also helped me finish it, so thanks for the help! Also, nothing earth shattering, but I finally updated my profile (it only took me nearly 3 years) so check it out if you want (I also created a new poll, so feel free to vote on that). And, while I was already writing this story before request's came in, I feel I should mention that people did request a chapter like this:

Marie Nomad: Will you reveal how Tony get turned back to normal?

Pergjithshme: How are they going to fix it?

Finally, I just hope you enjoy!

**The Eccentric Easter Escapade**

"And this goes here?" Clint asked, attaching a plug into an outlet. An affirmative squeak came from Tony. The two were in the middle of rewiring Tony's 'human-to-animal' machine, or what it was actually called: DNA Molecular Scrambler. It has been used only four times - to turn Clint into a hawk, then back to a human, then to turn F.B.J. into a human, then back to a turkey (when turning him into a human proved to be a horrifying experience) - which had to be rebuilt due to something that had happened to it, that neither of them remembered doing.

The reason they were doing that was because Tony had dressed up in a bunny costume for Easter, and had gotten stuck in it. So, he did the only sensible thing to do when one was in a situation like that: he instructed Clint to build a machine that would either peel or disintegrate the suit off of him.

The good news was that the machine had actually managed to get out of the suit. The bad news? He had somehow turned himself into a bunny. So now the DNA Scrambler was his last hope. If it was able to fix Clint's animal problem, then it should no doubt be able to fix Tony's as well.

It was times like now that Clint really _really _wished he had Tony's brains because if he did he would make sure that the machine would cause Tony to turn from human to rabbit and back again every five minutes.

But he didn't have Tony's brains (many people would say that is a very, very good thing) so all he could do was imagine Tony turning into a rabbit over and over. He had to make sure that for years to come whenever he felt low he would picture Tony as a rabbit. That would be a sure fire way to cheer himself up.

The world's first genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist... bunny rabbit. No matter what he had to get a picture of Tony like this, before he got changed back.

"Ow!" Clint cried, as bunny-Tony bit him. He even drew blood! "I swear to God Easter Bunny, if you gave me rabies, it'll be rabbit stew for dinner tonight!" Clint threatened.

Tony responded by squeaking at Clint a mile-a-minute, his nose twitching frantically and his whiskers a-flutter. How Clint didn't roll-over and laugh at this hilarious sight in front of him, he had no idea. He thought he might've been maturing, before mentally laughing at the thought.

"I was not daydreaming about taking a picture of you like this!" Clint protested. _'Damn, how the hell did he know I was?' _He suddenly paused, thinking about what just happened. _'I can't believe I'm taking crap from a rabbit_,_'_ he thought dismally.

Shaking his head, he drilled in several bolts to secure the machine, and make sure it wouldn't break apart when activated. Tony hopped over to inspect what Clint was doing before squeaking angrily.

"Now what?!" Clint cried, exasperated.

Tony did his best to point at a certain part, but when you're a rabbit, that was damn near impossible, so he hopped over to it and began thumping his foot at the blank spot (he made a mental note to look up where he had gotten that idea from).

Clint seemed to get the message loud and clear. "What do you mean there's a piece missing? Why would it be missing?"

Tony did his best to shrug, but again, he was a rabbit now. Some movements would be limited.

"Did you get a replacement for it?" Clint asked.

Tony nodded.

"Well then where is it?"

As if on cue, Bruce walked into the lab. "Hey Tony, I have the compartment for your – "He stopped at what he saw: Clint was in there with a bunny. Now that by itself wouldn't be a big deal, but the bunny was wearing an ACϟDC t-shirt and had a Chest RT in it's…well, chest. Plus, he swore he heard Clint arguing with it and it squeaking back defiantly. Bruce left the piece on one of the empty table spaces, turned around and walked away in the complete and opposite direction of the lab without saying a word. He did not want to know what was going on in there. It wouldn't be the first time he had walked into the lab with one of them in animal form, but he would do his best to try and make it his last.

Both Clint and Tony gave Bruce a strange look as he walked away, before walking (and hopping) to the compartment he had delivered. Tony squeaked something to Clint who just shrugged. "I don't know what his problem is. He should be used to us ending up in weird situations by now."

Tony nodded before hopping up on the table and sniffing the compartment, and then stopped once he realized what he was doing. Clint chuckled slightly amused at the sight in front of him. "Smell good?"

Tony gave him an evil death glare, which looked surprisingly scary coming from a rabbit.

Clint picked up the piece then took a couple of steps to his left, away from Tony. Upon inspecting it, he realized he had no idea what the hell it was. "So, what even is it anyway?"

Tony's squeak sounded as if he was scoffing at Clint's question, like he thought Clint was a class-A moron something. Clint decided he didn't like this.

"I realize it's for the machine, I'm asking what it is."

Tony shrugged again.

"You know for a genius, you don't really know that much about anything, do you?"

Clint was met with another shrug. He facepalmed. This was going to be a _looong_ day, he could tell already.

Finally, after several hours of screwing, grunting, and getting hot and sweaty (Tony would have to remind Clint of phrasing and how words can have unintentional double-meanings which other people can take the wrong way) they had reattached the…whatever it was to the machine, and it was now completely assembled.

Clint and Tony took a step back to admire their, well mostly Clint's, handiwork before Clint's eyes widened. The DNA Molecular Scrambler looked exactly like a villain's death ray machine from the movies and cartoons and such.

"Are you sure that's how it's supposed to look?" Clint asked wearily, glancing at Tony.

Tony let out a high-pitched squeak before looking embarrassed that he did so before nodding.

"All right then. Let's get this over with." He said while Tony hopped into position in front of the machine. He got behind the control panel and input the data. "You ready to do this White Rabbit?"

Tony let out a confused squeak. That was way too obvious a phrase, so Tony summed it up that it had to be a pun of some kind, though he didn't get it (and there were few things that Tony Stark did not get).

"It's a reference to Alice in Wonderland," Clint explained.

He squeaked again.

"It's a book."

*Squeak, squeak*

"No, Alice isn't the white rabbit, it really is a – " he stopped suddenly, pinching the bridge of his nose. He felt a headache coming on. "Look, do you want to be back to normal or not?" he snapped.

Tony hissed at him, but ultimately nodded his head.

"All right then."

Clint activated the machine, and then leapt behind the desk, just like last time. About 30 seconds later, when he was sure it was over he slowly and carefully peaked over the desk. There he saw Tony, full-sized again, looking slightly flushed, with his hands covering his crotch.

"May I please have my pants back now?" he asked, very slowly. Clint couldn't tell whether it was out of embarrassment or…well, he could only think of embarrassment, so he did what the billionaire asked and threw Tony some pants, then turned around while the said billionaire put them on.

"Well…" Tony sighed. "We are never doing that again. _Ever. _At least, not on, you know, purpose."

Clint nodded wearily, sitting down on the cool floor of the lab. It had been a very long day. "You got that right." Suddenly, he gasped in horror. "Oh crap!"

"What? What?!" Tony frantically spun around. "Please tell me I don't have a bunny tail or rabbit ears!"

"No, it's just…I never got a picture of you as a bunny."

Tony gasped, flabbergasted. "I knew you were planning to take a picture of me like that!"

Clint shrugged. "It seemed like a good idea at the time."


	6. Chapter 6 - The Colonel finally Popped

**A.N.** So, Iron Man 3 proved to be the winner, getting votes by everybody who participated (3). Thor: TDW got second with 2 votes, and The Wolverine in third with 1. I'll keep it open if anybody else wants to vote who didn't before. This is another short story that came to me, but I feel it resolves some issues between Tony and Rhodey. Enjoy!

**The Colonel That Finally Popped**

"You are really unbelievable Tony," Rhodey said, while briskly walking down one of Stark's seemingly endless hallways, with Tony right on his heals, trying to keep up. He was crisply dressed in one of his military uniforms, whereas Tony on the other hand was wearing ripped jeans, a white T-shirt smudged with grease all over it and a robe, hurriedly thrown on. He hoped he remembered to put on shoes too.

"Me?" Tony scoffed. "What did I do?" He honestly didn't remember. So many people had said that to him recently that he was loosing track of what he had done to whom. It was very confusing, and a bit unfair he thought. _'Clint does most of this stuff with me, so why do I always get blamed first?' _Granted, it was his idea almost every time, but there's no way in hell he'd tell Rhodey that.

Rhodey stopped abruptly, causing Tony – lost in deep thought - to almost crash into him. "You seriously want me to tell you what you did, like I would to a child?"

'_Finally, a simple solution to my dilemma. Was that so hard? And why can't everyone who confronts me do this?' _"Actually, yes, I would."

"First of all, you took the War Machine suit, without my permission I might add, and used it to play _Rock-Em, Sock-Em Robots_, destroying the roof of your Tower. And 2 - "

"I'm sorry, but I don't think I need your permission to use my suits for whatever I want to do with them," Tony interjected. He wanted to add that it wasn't _Rock-Em Sock-Em Robots_, but rather _Real Steel_ that inspired him to do that, but it probably wouldn't have made a difference.

"_Your _suit?" Rhodey asked incredulously.

"Oh yes, that's right. I seem to remember you stole it from me in the first place, so you seem to think it's yours now." Tony shrugged his shoulders. "Tomato, tomahto."

Rhodey gave him a look. "You're the one who was using it like a giant toy and threatening your guest's lives. I had to intervene."

Tony rolled his eyes. "I was dying and it was going to be –quite possibly- my last birthday party. 'Cuse me for making it fun for people. Anyway, what was the second reason for… whatever it was we were talking about?"

"And then when I came to your St. Patrick's Day party –I was to the only there, in case you forgot that too- you had Clint grab my legs, while you forced head my head back, and poured a 32 ounce bottle of Guinness down my throat. Then you dressed me up like a leprechaun, while I was passed out."

Tony shrugged. "That's your fault, *cough*lightweight*cough*. Nobody told you to swallow it."

"You were plugging my nose, pretty much preventing me from doing anything else."

Tony laughed, remembering that night. _'Oh yeah, I actually forgot I did that.'_ That was pretty funny…to him at least.

Rhodey wasn't the least bit amused.

"Oh lighten up. When did you become such a stiff in a suit?"

"When you decided to take away the Department of Defense's War Machine suit and deweaponized it," Rhodey shot back.

"Well, I guess you have a short-term memory too then, since you obviously forgot that I gave you an new, improved suit, specifically built for you I might add," Tony interjected.

Rhodey opened his mouth to respond, but stopped. Tony did make a good point.

The two just stood there awhile, neither sure what else to say.

Tony finally spoke up. "So…we cool?" he asked sincerely.

Rhodey thought about it. "Yeah, we are. Honestly."

Tony nodded. "All right then." The two shook hands then patted each other on the shoulder.

"You wanna come to the Tower and get plastered later tonight, by choice this time?"

"…Why the hell not?"

The next day Rhodey woke up, feeling like he was trampled by an elephant the night before. Upon sitting up and glancing around, he noticed he was in front of a destroyed Roxxon gas station, with Tony not so far away, still holding onto the empty gas carton in one hand. Rhodey groaned before looking in his hand and noticed he was holding a Stark Industries lighter in his…holy crap, the lighter was in _his hand_! He sighed, with the first words he thought of being "It seemed like a good idea at the time." Yeah, that would hold up real well in court.


	7. Chapter 7 - Overdone

Wow, sorry it's been so long without a story. School's been super busy especially since this was my final year. But now I can focus on writing full-time now…until I get a job. ;) So, the votes are in: Looks like iron is stronger than adamantium, steel, and uru. :P Though has anybody's mind change after seeing Man of Steel (If you haven't you should, it is **epic**!)? Let me know if you want me to redo the poll in the review. This is a sequel to 'Finished' by Marie Nomad. You guys should check it out if you haven't already; it's hilarious (and helps this chapter make sense). I was also able to get in some requests as well:

MarieNomad: I bet that JARVIS would be willing to give Clint a video from the security cameras.

kimbee: Jarvis would have footage *evil smile*

Seems like everybody wanted J.A.R.V.I.S. to help out Clint blackmail Tony. The reviewers are all evil. ;) Enjoy!

**Overdone**

"They did what?!" Stark practically shouted into his Stark-Tooth, entering his workshop. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Thanks for telling me Pepper." He hung-up with her, then sighed. "How many times have I invited them to go out drinking with me? Then here comes big-ol' Hercules with his magical elixir and all of a sudden, they're on the 4 o'clock news for adding torsos to the monument…which isn't even that bad, considering what we do when we're blitzed." Tony was having fun coming up with new ways to say the word drunk.

"At least it's something the Government can't blame me for this time, even though they tried to already." He sighed before noticing what Clint was doing. "And what are you doing, my eagle-eyed friend?" He asked walking over to Clint. He peered over his shoulder before Clint leapt to his feet and ran away from Tony, hiding the laptop from him.

"Whoa Clint, what the hell?" Tony exclaimed. "You planning to launch nukes or something?"

"Something like that," he responded, turning the screen to show Tony. Multiple folders were open, revealing photos, and videos of Tony drunk in various places and scenarios. Exclusive photos and videos, that Tony had removed from existence and stored in his own server. He probably should've just deleted them.

Tony's eyes narrowed. "How did get that information?"

Clint grinned smugly. "J.A.R.V.I.S. was helpful in providing the information and finding it all for me."

Tony growled. So he had two turncoats, eh? Not a problem; all he had to do was get the laptop away from Clint and - .

"Not so fast Stark," Clint warned, as if reading Tony's mind. "One more step and I upload all of it. Pictures of you as a rabbit, videos of you drunk, you name it." He grinned, and then looked at the laptop screen. "Guess I finally got you beat this - "

Suddenly, the laptop exploded. Clint eye's practically popped out of his head and he whirled to look at Tony, who now had the Mark 42's gauntlet on his right hand. He grinned. "Whoops."

Clint, who was still trying not to keel over from a heart-attack, dropped the smoldering piece of metal, then stared at Tony. "How the hell could you have put it on so quickly?"

Tony lowered his arm, smoke coming out of the repulsor port. "Long story short, I decided to create a neuro-link between myself and my armor."

"Um…Why?" Clint asked confused.

"Not sure really…it seemed like a good idea at the time actually."

Clint gave Tony a strange look. "Sure, whatever."

"Now," Tony walked over to his holo-table, ejecting the armor piece from his arm. "Continuing on what I was going to ask you before you tried to black mail me, traitor," He paused, then glanced up at JA.R.V.I.S. "You too, K.I.T.T. How would you like me to re-upload your system with Apple?"

"Please sir, he made me," The A.I. smoothly responded.

"Sure he did," Tony nodded, logging in. "Somehow I doubt that, but if that's what you say…" he muttered under his breath. "At least You and Dummy are with me, aren't you guys?"

The two robots beeped enthusiastically.

"Shut up," Tony snapped. "It was rhetorical."

Clint walked up next to him. "You're talking all over the place, man. What was the original thing you came in here for, which probably involves me, and most definitely involves booze?"

Tony grinned. "I'm going to find out what is in Hercules magical booze."

Clint eyed Tony warily. "Are you sure that's a good idea? You saw what happened when Steve had a few glasses. And the guy isn't even supposed to get drunk."

Tony nodded. "Exactly, that's why I need to know what was in it." Tony opened up the analysis of their livers. "I've already had J.A.R.V.I.S. scan both of their digestive systems and livers, to try and analyze any remnants of the wine." Once it was decoded, several different windows opened up; revealing different ingredients, how much of each ingredient was used, etc.

"Huh." Tony was deep in thought, studying the ingredients. "Surprisingly, almost all of them can be found on Earth." He brought some up, and flicked them away when he was done with them. "Just the usual: water, sugar, grapes, cranberries, etc."

"Sounds fruity…or vegetabley," Clint remarked.

"Not helpful," Tony said, still intensely looking over the list. He stooped suddenly. "Huh."

"What?" Clint asked, actually getting genuinely interested. That was rare when it came to Tony.

"Apparently the final ingredient is something called…The Golden Leaf of Fire. Something we, on Earth, definitely don't have…I'm assuming."

"Fire…" Clint thought for a moment. "Do you think a Trinidad Moruga Scorpion chili pepper would be a good substitute?" Stark gave him a look. "You know? Fire, chili pepper…could you stop giving me that look?" Clint said exasperated. "I'm trying to help figure out what we can use as a substitute."

Tony shook his head. "Nonsense; accept no substitutes my fine, feathered friend. All I have to do is examine the chemical engineering of the leaf, break its molecular structure down piece by piece, then recreate it in my lab." He grinned. "Elementary, my dear Hawk."

A few hours later, Tony and Clint stood there, looking at a test tube filled with a mahogany-goldish color.

"Well…it actually smells pretty good," Tony remarked.

"Yeah, very fruity…or vegetabley."

"Stop saying that," Tony said. "Seriously, please, just stop. It literally hurts my ears when you say that word."

Clint rolled his eyes. "Fine, let's just get drunk…crybaby."

Stark grinned. "On that, I say 'it can't happen soon enough.'"

He poured the liquid into two different goblets.

"Fancy," Clint commented. The goblets were very fancy: pure gold, complete with red, ruby diamonds around the rim.

"Well, that's what happens when you're a billionaire; you can pretty much buy anything you want."

"Here here!" Clint took his goblet, and clinked it against Tony's. Upon impact, the diamonds where the cups clinked, cracked and fell off of the goblets and onto the floor, where they shattered.

Clint gave Tony a look. "Really?"

The billionaire looked back, sheepishly. "And sometimes, when you're a billionaire you find out that certain, authentic Egyptian goblets are priceless and are to be kept in a museum for historical purposes and no amount of money you offer will allow you to take them home, forcing you to make your own out of items around the Tower."

"And for a billionaire, playboy, genius, philanthropist this was the best you could come up with?" Clint countered. Upon a second glance, the goblets actually looked quite cheap. Even the gold paint was staring to chip and flake off.

Tony shrugged. "Eh, you know…the economy…."

Clint rolled his eyes. "Whatever, let's just hurry up and get this over with; see if you actually recreated it or not."

They both took huge gulps of the wine, chugging it down. That was the last thing Clint remembered before the blackness took him.

**)()(**

Clint woke up, groaning. He covered his eyes as the sun beat down on them. He noticed he was covered head-to-toe in dust, and so was the area he was in. While sitting up, he looked around and gasped at what he saw. _'Damn it.'_ Struggling to get up, he wobbled over to Tony. "Tony, wake up." He kicked Tony in the ribs. Hard.

"Ow!" Tony shot right up, groaning and holding the spot where he was kicked. He glanced around for his attacker before finally seeing Clint. "What was that for?" he demanded.

Clint pointed upward. Ignoring Clint for the moment, Tony looked around and gasped. "What are we doing on the observing area for the Mount Rushmore…" his voice trailed off as he finished glancing upward to where Clint was pointing. The President's heads were all still there, the only thing missing were the newly-added torsos. Chunks of concrete slabs littered the base of the mountain. Tony hung his head; he already knew what had happened.

**)()(**

Back at the Tower, everybody was watching the news when Tony and Clint walked in. Tony closed the door and slowly made his way over towards the T.V. Clint hung out near the back of the room; he was certain he knew what was coming up.

"Apparently, Tony Stark was happy with the way the Monuments before they were changed and decided to take matters into his own hands to change them back." Video footage played as Stark in the Mark 42 went to town on the Monument's; blasting them with repulsor blasts, missiles, and even pounding on the torsos with his own fists to boot. "Remarkable," the reported commented once the video ended. "This is Ned Leeds, for the Daily Bugle telecast. Back to you Jack."

The T.V. in the Tower shut off as every member turned to stare at Tony and Clint.

"Would an 'I thought it would be a good idea at the time?' help in anyway, whatsoever, at all?" Tony asked, already knowing the answer.


	8. Chapter 8 - Comic-Con

So, because I skipped so many months without an update, you guys get two stories in a row! How nice am I? ;P So this is a prequel/sequel to L4J's comic-con chapter. The part of them going after that guy was supposed to be in L4J's story, but because she "couldn't think of where to go with it" I guess it's up to me to save the day…with her approval of course. ;)

Ophelia Lokisdottir: I was so hoping they'd go after the jerk who insulted their costumes

everfaraway: OMG! next chapter: plz tell us what happened at Comic-Con!

I hope you enjoy!

**What Happens at Comic-Con stays at Comic Con**

Clint, Steve, and Tony all entered the Tower quietly, hoping that no one was up. That hope was quickly diminished however, as they saw that the entire team was in-fact up and watching the T.V. in the living room.

"Hey guys, have you seen this? It's been all over the news!" Bruce called them over. "Someone in an Iron Man, or faux Iron Man suit decide to attack New York Comic-Con."

"I bet it's the Melter," Natasha mused. "S.H.I.E.L.D.'s been after him for years without success. It'd be just like him to attack a crowded area full of civilians."

Tony sucked in his breath for exhaling slowly. "It..um…it actually was me who did that." The group all turned to look at him. "Completely by accident of course!" He added, hoping that would help even a little bit.

Natasha sighed. "So, since I was somehow prepared for that, I figured I'd give you a chance to explain yourselves before I kill you."

Tony, Clint, and Steve all gave each other a look before turning back to the others.

"Well…" Tony started.

**Comic-Con: 12 hours ago**

Tony Stark stood up, wobbling as he did so, a serious expression on his face. "This guy talked down to me – I mean us, humiliated me – I mean us, and insulted me…I mean us. He has to pay for what he's done."

Clint and Steve gave each other worried looks. Even as buzzed as they were, they knew that this was a bad idea.

A few minutes later, the group was sleuthing around tracking down their "fan".

You would think from the amount of alcohol they ingested they would be beyond passed out drunk (especially from Hercules's elixir), but the sugar from the cotton candy counteracted the drowsiness effect from the alcohol, just as Tony had predicted.

"J.A.R.V.I.S. has a lock on him," Stark informed the others. "He should be at the Captain America comics stand."

Steve blinked in surprise. "They're still making Captain America comic books?"

"Yes, but these are originals from the 40's, so sellers hope to get a lot of money for them."

Steve raised an eyebrow. "How much?"

Tony thought for a moment. "Around $4,000 or sometimes _waaay_ higher if it's in perfect condition."

"What?!" Steve shouted, before quieting down due to some looks, and gestures, he received. "Just for a comic book?"

Tony nodded. "Yep." He chuckled off of Steve's expression on his face. "I know, it's crazy isn't it?"

"There he is!" Clint pointed.

The three glanced over to see him at the stand, arguing with the stand's owner.

"I'm telling you, this C.G.C. isn't 9.6!" The belligerent fan shouted back.

Tony rolled his eyes as the two continued to argue back and forth. He zoomed on the comic they were arguing about. "What a douche bag. It is totally a 9.6 grade."

"Focus," Clint reminded Tony. "Humiliate this guy so we can have our revenge, and then we can leave."

Tony nodded. "Fine, fine." Raising his hand he paused, glancing back at Clint and Steve. "Wait, which one won't kill him: lethal or non-lethal?" The three thought about it before they all shrugged. "I'll just go with lethal…what's the worst that can happen?"

"Lethal could be the one that kills him," Clint answered with a shrug.

He was silent for a moment. "Oh yeah," Tony said thoughtfully, before also shrugging. "Worse things have happened," he pointed out.

"Sounds good to me," Steve slurred in agreement before passing out face-first.

Clint nodded in agreement.

Perfect, they were all onboard. "J.A.R.V.I.S., what's the most lethal weapon in this suit?" Tony asked.

"That would be your improved Mark 6 "one-shots" sir, the metal-slicing super lasers."

Tony grinned. "Excellent." Locking on to the fan, he raised his right arm again, the laser powering up.

Clint was just sitting there with a delirious smile on his face, when he noticed something leaking out of the suit. "Hey Tony, yer suit's leaking out something goldish."

"Huh?" He glanced behind him as best he could. "Oh yeah, that's the alcohol that I had stored in the suit. Guess the power holding it in must've run out." He shrugged. "Oh well, I can always make more."

Tony glanced back to where the fan was only to discover he wasn't there anymore. "What?" He gasped in shock. "Where could he have gone? He was a pretty big guy, so he couldn't have gotten far."

If Tony wasn't drunk, he probably would've powered down the weapon, but he was drunk, so he wasn't exactly thinking clearly.

The beams cut through everything that happened to be in the way off of its destructive force, no matter what it was.

"Oh sh – !" Tony took a step back to try and balance himself, but slipped on the alcohol that had spilled out of his suit. The beams follow suit and sliced upward, destroying banners and posters that had been hung-up, as well as cutting the wall vertically in two, and slicing open the ceiling. Pieces of concrete debris started falling everywhere, smashing display stands wrecking priceless collectables and other rare items.

Everybody took off running and screaming, heading towards the exits. That was the last thing Tony remembered before passing out.

Waking up sometime later, Tony and Clint gave each a look of paralyzed fear, as Steve woke up. Eyeing the destruction and chaos around him, Steve looked at Clint who pointed at Tony who grinned sheepishly. The three then proceeded to make a hasty retreat towards the exit.

**Avengers Tower: Now**

"You burned down New York Comic-Con just to get revenge on some guy who didn't like your costumes?" Natasha asked, eerily calm.

"Technically, he did like my costume," Steve pointed out. "Besides, I only went along with it to make sure they didn't cause too much trouble."

Tony ignored the Star-Spangled Man's un-helpful comment. "You didn't hear how condescending he was to us. Don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same thing were you in my position," Tony desperately tried to defend himself.

Natasha gave him a deadly look. "Of course I wouldn't have done what you did. I would've walked away like an adult, because I wouldn't have cared what he said to me."

"Holy crap, look at this!" Clint exclaimed, un-muting the T.V.

"The police are now rounding up all of the Iron Men that attended the event in an attempt to find out which one was responsible for – "

Tony grabbed the remote and shut off the T.V. and put on a sheepish grin. "I – "

"Don't even say it." Natasha threatened.

He shut his mouth.

"You know you're going to go down there and tell the police that you were the one who did it," Natasha ordered. It _wasn't_ a question.

Tony nodded. "Yeah, yeah, yeah." He sighed. 'At least she can't stop me from thinking '_It seemed like a good idea at the time'.'_


End file.
